One year of no consumerism

It's been a slow journey to minimalism, and I can't say were there yet. My husband is on board, but not as enthusiastic about it as I am. He is supportive for the most part (although he thinks I'm crazy pants for wanting to get rid of our bed frame, dresser, and night stands). On this journey we still slip up and buy things we don't need. Especially when we go to a store for just a few needed items, and walk out with about 10 bags.

Last night we set a budget in place. We decided we're not buying anything we don't need. And to me that also means we will not be buying anything new unless we have to. My husband and I are getting more and more into running, so if we need a few new articles of clothing or a new pair of shoes, that's not something we'll skip out on.

We set up a personal allowance for each of us, and an entertainment allowance for our entire family. Things like movies, dining out, ect. I can pretty much say with confidence I won't use my allowance to buy anything new, but I can't speak for my husband. I doubt we will be perfect on this journey and never slip up, but it's worth a try.

I know we seem completely crazy, and most will not understand what we're trying to do. I don't want to live a life where we constantly owe banks money and are a slave to our belongings. I want to minimize our waste as a family of 5, and get as much use of out items as we can. Less things will end up in landfills this way. I want to live in a way that brings our family closer together and lets our creativity flow.

So here we go, June 1st 2014 - June 1st 2015. I will do my best to document how we are doing once a week.

Round 2 in the living room!

A few months ago we ventured into the living room and really purged quite a bit! In reading the book I mentioned in the last post (the joy of less), I decided it was time to go back in there. You know what I realized? I really still had a LONG way to go. I feel like the word minimalism is going to mean different things to different people. Well, I guess a better way to say it would be that there are different levels. I mean, I've heard of people living with 100 items. And when you think about it, that's hardly anything! I can't even begin to guess how many items we still own.

Anyway, I looked at my entertainment area. Still quite a few items. The walls, LOTS of pictures and wall decor/art up. Also, our dogs have a bed in our living room, and a dog crate. Recently our puppy (well she's not exactly a puppy anymore) finally stopped eating things at night, so I decided to put up her crate today. I won't say I'm done with the living room, because I want to wait till my husband gets home and see what he thinks about it, but I will say I have a fresh look on everything again. I am hoping by tomorrow I will have really reduced the amount of items in my living room yet again!

I really highly recommend this book, though. I'm only a little over 1/3 of the way through it, and I cannot believe how much it's changing the way I look at everything, and the way I feel as well. One big thing I have adapted is I am basically having a conversation with each item I own. It's going to take a long time to get through everything, but I have made so much progress already I am so excited. So, the conversation (usually in my head, ha) goes something like this; What purpose do you serve in my life? How often do I use you? Would I miss you if you were gone?

Sounds silly, but those really are good questions to ask yourself about the things you're deciding to keep, or move on out. Also good questions to ask about things you're considering bringing into your home. So, back into the living room I go!

The Joy of Less

I have decided to spend a little dough and purchase a minimalist book. At first I thought to myself "This goes against what we're trying to do by not spending money" Let me tell you, I've spent money on a lot of silly things, but this was not one of them. I'm only 17% of the way through the book (says our Kindle), and I am very impressed. It's so much more than just "get rid of your stuff!!!". The first handful of chapters are just thinking about why we do things things, ect. It really opened my eyes so much.

We live in a culture that just lives to consume, not consumes to live. How much do we really need? Do we really need to keep up with the Jones'? Why? Why do we feel compelled to have everything, when we already have so much more than we ever needed? Yesterday the book had inspired me to go through a lot with a fresh mindset, and it worked! I was able to get rid of a lot. This past weekend I had a baby shower to attend. I had all these Mommy Necklaces (these are cute little necklaces basically meant for nursing mothers to give the baby something safe to play with while nursing, vs your hair). I kept them because they're so pretty and I do wear them once in a while. But then I thought about it, and I really thought my friend would get much more use out of them than myself. So, I passed all of them to her. Not only did it feel amazing to pass them on, but she really appreciated it, and even her husband thanked me later at church saying that they meant a lot to her. WOW!

Anyway. I feel so refreshed in my minimalist journey. I had already made SO much progress, but reading this book is really just energizing me more than ever! I want to change my whole way of thinking. Not just purge a few times a year, but keep bringing things in. I highly recommend this book. You can find it here The Joy of Less

Don't forget about the clutter in your head!

I have to keep telling myself this is a journey. Think, marathon, not sprint. I keep hearing that, but seriously, it's the best way to describe it. I have slowed down a wee bit on minimizing while focusing on getting everything done that needs to be. It has occurred to me lately that I just have too much going on again. Some things I can't avoid, much as I'd like to. But some things I just reeeeeeeeeeally didn't want to let go of, though I know it was at a point where it was creating more stress for myself, and more to do.

Ever heard that saying "too much of a good thing"? I definitely think there is. When it gets to the point where there's more of something than you can use in a year, yeah... Too much. Especially if it's creating more clutter/stress. I have gone through some slight obsessions. For example, baby legs. Heard of them? They're itty bitty leg warmers for babies. Seriously adorable, and very useful. So I took that, and ran with it! My daughter had almost 30 pair. It was INSANE. To think of the money I spent on that, when a few pair would have sufficed.

I read my devotional today and it was talking about the American dream. You know, bigger, better, faster, stronger... More more more. It's so hard for my generation especially with all the mommy wars, and social media. Everyone wants what others have. I do too, sometimes. I was just talking with my husband about this yesterday, actually! Then to have it right there in my face today was almost like the answer I was looking for.

Back to my original idea for this post (I saw something sparkly, sorry!) I tend to think SO much. I get the gut feelings, but the I have to rationalize EVERYTHING. I pretty much just drive myself crazy. So, when you decide to take it from gut, to brain, ask yourself these questions. Does this add value to my life, or stress? Do I really need ALL of this, or just some of it? If you find yourself thinking a ton about it, maybe talk about it out loud with someone. You never know, the answer just may come to you in a really unexpected way.

But my point is, I want to stress less. I am going to be taking the time to face these things that are stressing me out, and find a solution to them. Getting rid of the mental clutter, as well as the physical clutter :)

Do you have anything on your mind lately you're trying to sort out? I'd love to hear your thoughts on this. I hope my journey is helping others who're wanting to try this out as well!

Distractions, and a confession.

Distractions... They're everywhere. Electronics I think is a big one for us. The computer, the T.V. (we got rid of Dish last year then after a few months without it turned it back on), the Kindle, our phones. Geeeeeez! If I could just use them the way I intend to, it wouldn't be an issue. But I get caught up. I feel like we're missing out on life because of all of these distractions.

I want to be healthier. I want to put more time into my business. I want to get our house organized so that it's just maintenance after that. I want less stress, and more time. Yet I can't seem to break away from the distractions. I've also got books I've had for years that I want to read. I want to crochet more. Why do we do this to ourselves? I usually use these things as a reward or break when I've done a lot of work, but then that's where I get sucked in and can't break away.

So here it is, my confession. It's MY fault. I have the choice of where to put my focus, and sometimes, I don't make good decisions. I feel like until we admit things like this, it won't change. Yes, we have VERY busy lives. But the little bits of time I do have, I need to choose wisely what I do with that time. If I'm trying to get healthy, and I spend that time playing Candy Crush (DON'T PLAY IT IF YOU HAVEN'T, it's addicting), even 10 minutes at a time 5 times a day. That's 50 minutes of my day I can't get back. Why not 10 minutes of Candy Crush, 30 minutes of working out, and 10 minutes tidying up the house? There are lots of options, but I just have to stop making excuses, and get to it!

No one likes to have these things pointed out by others, because we get defensive. So, let's sit down and think to ourselves about it instead, and admit to ourselves what our weakness' are, and if we're wanting real change. I definitely do, so this is me giving myself a swift kick in the butt, and signing off to get some stuff done :)

Another bedroom down! Our sons room!

This weekend I helped my oldest son with his room. I have been dreading this because he wants to hold onto everything. I'm talking rocks from outside, acorns, papers galore, ect. His room isn't tiny, but it's not that big. He has a full size bed in there, a dresser, and a desk. His desk was full of papers and all kinds of stuff. He had even stashed stuff under his bed, and in his closet. It took a good few hours with breaks between to get it done.

But you know what? I think I planted a seed. I had him bring one drawer full of items to the middle of the floor, and we created 3 piles. Throw away, give away, and put away. When everything was said and done, we had an entire box of donations, 90% of his items had a place (we're looking for some smaller sized bins for lego's and such) and he got rid of most of his papers and misc items he brought in from outside. I think he even had fun!

When we first started it, he didn't want to really get rid of much, but when he saw the piles filling up, he got more into it! We humans are very visual. It seems like with me and my family especially, the more progress we SEE, the more we want to do! What I really liked about this experience, is that he was fully involved, and I could almost see the way he was thinking change! I hope that this will help him as he grows up, so that things are always manageable for him and stress free!

I highly encourage you to try this with your child if they're at an age where they can help you. For one, it's always nice to have company when doing this, and two, they might really enjoy it :)

Our bedroom. One HUGE task we've been avoiding since we moved in.

A little back story. We bought our house in Feb of 2013. It has 4 bedrooms so each of our children finally have their own room. One of the rooms used to be a garage, so we do not have one. We have a little shed in the back of the property, but it's not fit for storage. So, our closet is our storage. No real attic to speak of, or basement. That's it. Now, our bedroom is ENORMOUS! Which you'd think is great, right? But the issue is it is also my craft/office, and our workout room. So, too much going on to say the least.

My parents are here for a few days, so instead of them watching the kids so we could have a date (I'm too sick to go out anyway) we asked them to watch the little ones so we could figure out our bedroom and closet. I know, so romantic :) It took us a solid 2 hours. We went through probably 85% of our belongings both in our room and closet. Let me tell you, it was no easy task. Boxes and boxes of items and photo's and such we've had for years. Some things for decades.

We took a lot of trash out, and filled up my car with yet another load of donate items. I am only posting a few photo's because we still have a little work to do, but now we can do it here and there since the bulk of things are gone. I refuse to let it get to that point again. I refuse to bring in more things that will just take up space. Our lives are changing for the better so we can focus on what's really important :)

Please excuse the black squares. Hubby has a photo of him by the treadmill after his first deployment of non stop working out as motivation LOL.

10 weekly goals- update

When I planned my weekly goals last Wednesday, I didn't plan on getting even sicker than I was. So, some things didn't get done unfortunately. Also, it's a busy time of the year with 3 kiddo's in 3 different schools. Different Christmas parties and such. That meant a lot of time and energy went into making/buying supplies for those parties.

So, that being said, if you'll notice the important things are crossed off. Time with family. I didn't get to cleaning my daughters room with her. But we've spent a lot of one on one time together this week none the less. I will likely not make a list for this week as I need to pretty much do nothing but rest. But this hopefully gives anyone following an idea to try :) Let me know if you've tried it and what you think!

Original 10 weekly goals post

Knowing when to let go

Deciding to try to minimalist approach to life is HARD. Mostly it's hard to get started, but sometimes even when you're in a good groove, you'll hit a road block. Things like "But my grandmother gave this to me", and "If I get rid of it, I might find that I need it later and have to buy it again", or "This is really cute, and it's in perfect condition!" We are in the beginning stages of minimalism, and I can promise you we will never be the true definition of minimalists, but we are going to do the best we can to achieve happiness, and freeing ourselves from our over abundance of belongings.

So, let me touch on those things that pop up into your mind when going through things. This is another thing I learned from Flylady. Start small. In one area of a room. Maybe pull out a box that you've been meaning to go through. You want to have 3 categories that you put things in. Put away, throw away, give away. I'll give examples on each categories, and those thoughts listed above. Here we go!

In our bathroom (this is the room I chose to deep clean and organize this week) I found some dog ear cleaner. One of our dogs is a breed that is known to have ear issues because they're floppy ears, and very very furry. When we got him over 3 years ago, we bought some to prepare ourselves. I found it in our bathroom 2 days ago and thought "Well, we got lucky and he has never had ear trouble, but I should probably hold onto it in case he does, so we don't have to buy it again" Seriously, Stacey? You've had it for more than 3 years, he hasn't needed it yet, and it's just getting moved around from one place to another, and from one house to another! We move a lot being a military family. Oh, and look, it's EXPIRED! So once that voice of reason came out, it was a pretty easy decision, after all. And, if one day we have to buy some more, we just will. Another way to avoid this, is don't buy things you think you MIGHT need.

So, that went in the trash. Next order of business. This is really cute, and it's in perfect condition! I had a very overflowing basket full of lotions and body sprays. Even as a woman, you won't use 10 bottles of body spray in a very quick amount of time. I had stuff in there that was full that I've had for FIVE years. I'm not even kidding. So, I went through and picked my favorites that I use constantly, and took the rest to the donate pile. OK, this is getting easier... Next!

This was in a different room, but this was one of THE hardest decisions I've made so far in my journey. My grandmother on my dads side passed away 2 days before my 5th birthday. I do remember her, but my memories are almost like photographs in my head. She was a very sweet lady, who loved to craft. She crocheted lots and lots of goodies for everyone in the family, and we have a BIG family. I had a blanket that was made by her that my mom passed down to me because she didn't want it anymore. The thing is, it's not something I honestly wanted, and it was being packed and stored and only taken out to look at once in a while.

Here's why I made the decision to let it go. My grandmother made it, yes. But holding onto that is not how I am choosing to remember and honor her. Keeping something that she made, and putting it in a box for decades is not doing it any justice. I know there is someone out there who could/would appreciate it the way it was meant to be, so I decided to donate it. I feel so much better about it having gone to the mission to raise money to feed the homeless, than it sitting in a dark box on a shelf.

And the things you love, but don't have a home. Find a home for them! Put them on display. If you can't think of a place for it that it will get some use, or be appreciated, maybe you don't love it as much as you thought you did?

Don't forget, once you get a box full of donations, put it in your car to take the next time you are out :)

Less is more.

The idea is pretty simple, yet it's SO hard to really live by this. We live in an age where consumerism is constantly shoved down our throats. Think about it. You watch T.V., commercials come on, and it's "buy this" "buy that". Same with the web, radio, and just driving around. Think of all the billboards telling you what you "need"! Do we really need all these things to be happy? Or, is it possible that we are actually becoming a slave to our possessions?

Here's an example. Facebook. It can be such a great thing! Really! A way to connect with our family, and friends. But what else do you see on facebook? One thing that stands out to me, is what people show off. And I will be the first to say I have done it a number of times! My husband bought me a beautiful necklace last Valentine's day, and BOOM, off to Facebook land to show it off. Now, I'm not saying never buy someone you love a gift, and never let on that you like receiving gifts. What I'm saying, is, sometimes we are so excited about something we just got, that we want to share it with everyone. When it comes down to it, why do we do this?

I think partly, is we want to give thanks publicly to the person who gave us the gift. It's nice to be appreciated. But another thing it might convey to others, is, "neener neener neeeeeeeeener" We didn't have much when we first got married, so when we started having a little extra cash flow, it was so nice to get new things. A new T.V., a new computer, a new car, ect. You work hard, you deserve to have some things you want. But where do we draw the line? The age we live in says, we DON'T. We always need to upgrade. Bigger, better, faster, stronger... You know?

We have started to change this about ourselves. Sure, we still have things we want. Sometimes we still spend money on things we don't need, but we are trying to change that. We are turning away from all the latest and greatest, and trying to ignore it. Because when it comes down to it, is it really that important? Is it really going to make our lives better? No. It's going to cause more distractions from what's important, and it's going to keep our cash going out just as fast as it comes in. .

So, onto what I was getting at. My husband and I decided we are not going to bring anything into our house that we do not need, and we are going to talk about the things we bring in before we make that decision. We have debt. Car debt, house debt, and we want to climb out of it. We do OK, and we give to a lot of charities. We want to be able to do that more, too. We can't take our money with us, and in the end we don't want to be remembered by what we had, but rather what we gave.

As we are not making careless decisions with our money, we are hoping, and expecting our savings account to grow, so that we may pay off our debt. Our children are young, and now is the time to instill some good habits and lessons. We will probably never be that couple with the beautiful family photo's done every few months. We will probably never be that family who's home you envy because it is so big, and fancy. We will probably never be that family who has expensive cars, and all the latest gadgets. But we will (I hope, and pray) be that family who is happy, and loving, and gives more than they receive.

God willing, we will be able to keep the momentum going, and keep learning and opening our minds to this lifestyle.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this, and if you have any suggestions of your own. Please leave a comment if you feel compelled.

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle. How I made a new dog bed with items just taking up space!

Since my husband and I made a decision not to bring anything into the house unless we absolutely need it, now we need to focus on getting stuff OUT of the house. But what about all those things on your list you need to buy? What if some of those things, you can make yourself out of things that are already in your home, taking up space? What an idea! We have to be careful with this idea though, and make sure it's REALLY something we need, and not just something we think we need.

So, here's the story. We have 2 dogs. They each have their own bed, and both of those beds are small. Yet, instead of laying in their own beds, they curl up together in one, which means either one or both of them are hanging off the bed! Which is pretty cute, and funny... But I also kept telling myself "Man, I really need to get them a bigger bed!" I had this idea about a month ago, but of course half the stuff I knew I had in the house I couldn't find. Why? Because of clutter. Oy!

So, I finally found what I was looking for. A few years ago, we bought some fleece to use as a background to take our own Christmas family photo's of the kids. They turned out pretty cute, too! So I have two REALLY big bunches of fleece hanging around. My parents left some old pillows here for when they come through and visit (they live 6 hours away). To be honest, they're pretty old. The pillows that is, not my parents. Still in decent shape, but I know they have more pillows they could bring. I asked them if it was OK to use them for a project, and they said sure. So... Here's what happened!


                 What's this stuff, Mom?? Can we play with it?

 

 

 

These are some happy pups! Here is a good tutorial to how to do these if you've never done a tie blanket. I promise it's really easy, and anyone can do them! Tie blanket tutorial

Do you have your Christmas decorations up yet?

I have to wonder what true minimalists homes look like during Christmas. I'm sure they still decorate, but it probably doesn't look like Christmas threw up in their house. I LOVE Christmas! I love the true meaning of Christmas the most, but I also love the decorations that really bring a lot of joy to families, especially children.

We (and by we, I mean my husband helped a tiny bit) pulled down all our decorations the other night, and put them up after our kids went to bed. I found a 4ft pre-lit tree, along with our 6 foot. See, when we got married, we lived in this teeeeeeeeeeeny tiny little apartment. While we lived there, it was just us, and our oldest son, Logan. We had no room to even move around each other, so getting a very small tree was a no brainer.

Then we bought our first home 10 months after we moved into that apartment. We decided it was time for a bigger tree, since at that point we had our second son, too. So, we got a 6 foot pre-lit tree, and we kept the smaller one with the idea that we could use that for the kids to decorate, too.

Well, that never happened, as we had a 3rd child, our little girl, only 15 months after our second son. To add to that, a tradition in my family is that the kids get an ornament every year. So 3 kids, 3 ornaments a year from us, my mom and dad still do it for their grand kids, and my grandmother also still does it. So that's 9 ornaments a year, times 4 years (this is my daughters fourth Christmas) YIKES!

So, needless to say, we've acquired quite a bit of ornaments. We decided with the lifestyle we are striving for, we really need to be a little more practical. That 4ft tree has never been used other than that first year. And instead of buying a ton of ornaments, I started (this year) giving them each one from my childhood. They think that's so special.

Once I went through everything, we really didn't have a lot of decorations to put up, but the home we live in really doesn't have a lot of space, either. So, I have decided to bless someone with our tree, and decorations we don't want anymore. I put an ad on Craigslist this morning. We did this another year, and the woman that came to get them was so grateful. She said they just moved and just got married, and just didn't have the money to get any yet. What an amazing feeling to help someone else.

First step was the decision, what's next?

Hello everyone! So the biggest step is to decide to do this at all, right? I guess I will see! Have you heard of Flylady.net? If not, do check it out! She is a wonderful woman who started a web page to encourage others to get organized! One big thing I learned from her, is to get rid of it! If you do not love it, use it, or have a purpose for it, why do you have it? I have filled many boxes this year and taken them to the local mission to donate. It feels amazing. To let go of these things, and know that not only am I freeing myself from the clutter, I am blessing someone else!

What she says, is to box it up, or bag it up, either way... And take it straight to your car! Don't put it in a closet, or in your garage. You'll forget about it, and then it's just clutter that you moved from one place to another. So, you load it up, and the next time you are out, you drop it off! For me, I wait till I have a few boxes in my car, but still take the stuff once I have enough. We live in the country a little ways, so if I'm going to drive 20 minutes each way, I'm going to make sure it's a healthy sized haul :)
So folks, as you are boxing things up, don't forget to take the items to your car!

This is where it begins. My journey to minimalism.

For YEARS I have struggled with "stuff". I'm not at all a professional therapist or anything of the sort, but I do have some ideas of how I got to where I am today. A little about myself; I am a 28 year old woman. I am a wife, and a mother. I have been married to my life long friend for a little over 5 years now, and we have 3 children. 8, 4, and 3. My husband is in the Army, and I am a stay at home mom. That in itself is a struggle for me at times because I worked my tail off before we got married, and was a single working mom. Our oldest is mine from a previous marriage. So not working is a bit of an adjustment for me even still.

So, where I think it all started. My parents are closet hoarders. Not the kind you see on T.V. They're not gross in any way, and they don't have items stacked to the ceiling. Well, actually they do in some places. Back when I was younger, they had a lot of stuff, but not anywhere near what they have now. My dad had rental properties, so that's where some of his stuff came from. He really got into yard sales when I was young. He'd go to yard sales, and he'd have them. The amount of time spent going to yard sales, and preparing for his own. Where my dad got into it, I think comes from his childhood. Growing up with a family of 9, they did a lot of hand-me-downs, and they just didn't have a lot. This way my dad can have a lot, but save his money. Makes sense.

And you know, that's fine. That's what they enjoy, and they don't have any issues with the amount of stuff they have. But with me, it makes me crazy. Seriously, I think I turn green sometimes and grow 10 times larger than I am. It takes a big dose of Snickers to calm me down. So, I think I get the habit from my parents. Stuff makes us happy, right? Then when my husband and I got married, we had nothing. I mean, we used our laundry basket as an entertainment center, and slept on an air mattress for a while. Now, we live in a somewhat small house for our size family, but we have SO MUCH STUFF!
So, here are the problems I see with this much stuff. I have ADHD, and Anxiety. The amount of stuff we have us just flat out unmanageable. I can't keep up with cleaning, and there's just too much clutter. When my house isn't clean, my Anxiety, and ADHD is in full swing. When those are in full swing, I am CRANKY. I have read that those who choose to try the minimalist lifestyle, end up with less stress, more time, more money, ect. So, here goes!

Today I am doing my best to get started, but not go crazy. This is going to be a process, and is going to take a very long time to get a real habit going. So, I've started in my kitchen. I want our teeny tiny little kitchen to be fully functional, and not an eyesore. I would absolutely love it if anyone is following along to post your thoughts and suggestions. I am hoping that along my journey, I can inspire others, too.